I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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