Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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