you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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