margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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