I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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