never play flip cup with pint glasses
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Even my vagina gasped.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
