Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Randomize
