maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize