A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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