she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
How external is "for external use only"?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
