Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
