perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
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