yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
