giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
