I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
