I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
