First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
