We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
