Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Randomize
