I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
