remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Randomize
