God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
