I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize