you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
