I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize
