just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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