I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
