they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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