i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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