Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Randomize
