my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
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