What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
