So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
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