So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
