I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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