If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize