I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize