another moral hangover. fuck.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
