i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
