Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
