R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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