going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
