Whod you bang
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
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