i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
Randomize
