Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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