At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
