Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize