You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
