He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Farmville is her only friend.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize