i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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